by Gary Dontzig and Steven Peterman (104 pages)
Awards: None that I could find.
Points of Interest:
- Pacing: Teaser starts with a standard gag. Not over the top funny, but introduces the characters well. A bit slow in Act One but essential for setting up the tone of the show. Tension builds in the subsequent acts as Vicki fights with her mother refusing to attend the wedding and Luis learns to put his head under water. It’s not unique but pacing is tight.
- Screen Visibility: Minimal.
- Formatting: Generous spacing with double spaced dialogue and single spaced capitalized action. Character action is underlined. Appearing actors are in parentheses at the beginning of each scene.
- Dialogue: Jokes are a bit standard if not lame. Someone named Nectarine complaining about fruit jokes and threatening to change her name to carrot. Strip search in Tucson made me laugh but then additional dialogue after the joke was unnecessary. “Scary bastard in the red suit” is funny. Maddy has some good lines as the “frenemy” but then disappears until the end of the episode. The scene with Bob as a former Special Forces guy with some strange abilities is quite cute. His “skull getting 6 HBO’s got a laugh from me. Edie, Vicki’s mom also has some funny lines in Act Two and Three. Luis’s line in Act Five about Maddy and her former lover is priceless. Some of the dialogue is rather non-essential, like “hellos” and “good-byes” in various scenes.
- Action: Minimal. Capitalized and underlined. Some minimal actor direction is offered. “Pete shakes his head. Jack takes a deep breath”.
- Act Structure: TEASER. ACT ONE, A, B, C, D, E. (No F or G) ACT TWO, H, (No I), J, K, L, M. (No N or O) ACT THREE, P, (no Q), R, S, T. ACT FOUR, U, V, (No W) X. ACT FIVE, Y, Z, AA, BB,
Note: Edie is played by Joan Rivers. Shooting draft dated April 7, 1998. Length of script would imply a two or three part episode.
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